Ronald Leach and Vashon Borich were married on March 19, 2016 at Thorncrown Chapel, Eureka Springs, Arkansas. As you can see, the chapel is beautiful, nestled in the woods.
This is their wedding homily. Because the chapel is such a popular place where many choose to get married, the service and sermon were abbreviated (hence, the word “homily” for the sermon).
God created Adam. God had the animals parade before Adam, for him to name them. More was going on there than a classification of the species. Adam began to hunger inside, yearning for someone like him. For after looking at all the animals, he found himself alone. This longing came from God, which the task He gave to Adam brought forth.
So, God put Adam into a deep sleep, and He took out something from Adam’s side (the Hebrew is not as precise as “rib”). God then formed Eve into being. Now, we could think this makes Eve into a subset of Adam because God brought her into being from the flesh of Adam.
Not so, for God created both Adam and Eve in His image (Genesis 1:27). God formed Eve in His AND Adam’s image. Being both, she was the same, yet different from Adam.
Why should this even matter? Here’s why. Adam realized no “helper fit for him” walked around in the animal kingdom. Helper is such an incomplete word, trying to deliver the depth of an idea in the original Hebrew. Eve was like Adam, but opposite in nature to him. She was Adam’s counterpart, but also the one who completes him.
God intended Eve and Adam to be different. Each brought different talents and gifts to the table. Adam was incomplete because Eve had strengths that Adam needed. So also with Eve. So also with you: Vashon and Ron. You each bring different talents and gifts to the table.
God made you both different. He wants you that way. Such differences force you to stop focusing on yourself and look out into a larger vista, recognizing each other’s strengths. Rely on them. Serve the other with joy, with the strengths you have, where the other is lacking.
You share of your character, energy, personality, life, given in love. Love is patient and kind, not envious or boastful. Love is not arrogant and rude. Your love of serving the other isn’t only what you do, but how you do it: Love isn’t irritable or resentful.
For a gift to be a gift, someone must give it. Ron, serve Vashon as Christ served, and serves, His Church. Our Lord died for us, for our salvation; so, if needed, God calls you to die for Vashon. As Christ gave, so also do you. Your source for serving her even comes from Jesus.
In your life, when Vashon looks at you, let her see Jesus. For if you don’t first give, how is she to receive from you? Our Lord first gives before we can become His people. So also with you. Ron, when your marriage enters an impasse, which will happen, at some time, you must first give to heal the wound. In love, God calls you to crack the ice when the chill descends.
Vashon, the receiver receives with heartfelt joy. The dreaded “S” word in traditional marriage, submit, is a joy-filled word. We’ve just let our sinful nature misunderstand what our Lord means by it. Men have abused that word in times past, leaving a sour aftertaste in our mouths. So, we’re pressing the reset button.
Submit (in the New-Testament Greek) means being properly ordered, serving where God places you. Ron does this by devoting himself to you. You do so by receiving from Him—responding to, and in, love. But everything starts with Jesus. Jesus begins and completes your faith (Hebrews 12:2). He serves you with life and salvation every time you receive Him in Word and Sacrament.
So, receive from Ron as you would from the Lord, with joy and gladness. Not to submit is not to receive the gifts he wants to give you. That would be like our Lord’s Church being in wild rebellion, not receiving Jesus in the preached Word and Sacraments. How unthinkable!
The life of the Christian centers on Jesus. With Him as your center, your life unfolds from there. You serve your neighbor; a task Jesus gives His disciples to do (Matthew 22:39). Ron, for you, your first neighbor is Vashon. For you, Vashon, it’s Ron.
Yes, you will mess up, but when you do, ask for forgiveness. And give it. Forgive as Jesus keeps forgiving you. When you do that, everything becomes new again. In Christ, everything is new. Delight in Him all your days. Delight in each other all your days.
Indeed, what our Lord declares is true: What God unites in love, let no one separate! Amen.
